Is Your Chat Line Partner Toxic?
We’ve all had that experience when we think that we’ve fallen for someone, only to realize that the person is actually bad news. All that time and energy which was invested in the person feels like a total waste, and we are left heartbroken by the realization that he/she might be a bad apple. We’re here to let you know that the energy and time was not wasted, and in fact can act as a great learning lesson for next time. However, if you’ve already gone through this once, you should never have to deal with it again. When using a chat line as a dating service, it can be difficult to gage what kind of person you are speaking to on the other end of the phone. Based on our research and our own personal experience and life lessons, we’ve come up with things to look for to determine whether the new cutie you’re crushing on is a good person at heart, or incredibly toxic:
Toxic people are unable to respect the boundaries that others set forth. They say things that might be offensive to you or make you feel uncomfortable. While there’s a chance that you never explicitly told you partner what lines you didn’t want crossed, there are some social boundaries that all respectful people adhere to. Among those are boundaries that are sexual in nature, boundaries against offensive language or insensitive jokes, or an adverse feeling towards comments that go below the belt. These are limitations that you should not have to set, your partner should respect all of these automatically.
Doesn’t Respect Things You Say
If you find yourself feeling incredibly insecure about the things you say to your partner, there’s a chance that it’s because your partner isn’t showing you the respect which you deserve. Toxic people often force others to walk on eggshells around them. You may fear that what you say will make your partner angry or make your partner laugh at you. Chances are that you aren’t saying anything wrong, and that their expectations of you are completely selfish and unfair.
Doesn’t Remember Things You Say
Do you constantly repeat yourself when you are speaking to your partner? It might be because your partner isn’t really listening, which is a clear indication of selfishness. People who are selfish to the degree in which they can’t listen to anything anyone else says, they should be avoided and left alone to talk to themselves. Healthy relationships are reciprocal and caring on both ends.
Talks About Himself/Herself Often
Another indication of selfishness is a narcissistic attitude towards oneself. If you feel like you can’t ever get a word in with your partner because he/she won’t stop talking about himself/herself, there’s a fair chance that your partner doesn’t have the capacity to care about anyone else aside from himself/herself.
Has a Short Fuse
Again, you should never feel like you must walk on eggshells around the person you claim to be in love with. A person with a short fuse can be very stressful to deal with and actually dangerous in many ways. Not only can it alter your mental health negatively, but there’s a good chance that this angry person will get physical with you. Protect yourself by recognizing whether or not your partner has unreasonable anger issues.
Seems Too Good To Be True
Many sociopaths are, for whatever reason, incredibly charming. This charm that they have might allow you to disregard some of their negative traits. Perhaps they make promises that they can’t keep or describe your relationship as if it is a fantasy one minute and a nightmare the next. People with grandiose ideas who make unfulfilled promises are in line with sociopathic behavior. That would mean that they are actually incapable of fulfilling their half of any relationship, so don’t get sucked in by their momentary bliss.
Talks About Other Partners With You
If you have expressed to your partner that you want a monogamous relationship (or if it should be obvious that the relationship is headed in that direction) and he/she continues to tell you about other sexual experiences that he/she is having, leave the relationship immediately. What that means, without a doubt, is that the person is not right for you because he/she doesn’t care enough to respect your feelings in the situation. Nine times out of ten, this never changes no matter how badly you may want it to. Discussing these things with you is either a subconscious or conscious way of telling you it isn’t going to work out in the long run.
Makes You Feel Exhausted or Insecure
For a relationship to grow and remain healthy, it’s important that both parties feel (or eventually feel) like they can be totally themselves. Does your partner make you feel like you need to hid parts of yourself? Are you exhausted when you consult your inner-monologue about the situation? Good people give off positive energy, which fuels healthy relationships. If you are feeling exhausted or embarrassed around your ‘soulmate,’ you’re going to want to re-evaluate his/her position in your life and if you’d be better off without him/her.